What can you do in 70 seconds?

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Boilerplate comment about these fast forward links I use the 70 seconds between emails to provide some entertainment value. The more you fast forward, the more little gems you'll find hidden along the way.

As you know... I need about 291 words (not just normal ones, good ones), to keep you entertained for 70 seconds.

Since I'm writing all of these fast-forward transitions in one go on a beautiful Saturday (sounds like a fun way to spend time, right?), there's just no escaping the fact that I'm gonna get a little lazy with them (occasionally). This is one of those times.

Being the enterprising young man that I am, I decided to google stuff that you can do in 70 seconds. What did I find? A long list of things that take 60 seconds (so I figured I could fudge it a little bit).

Here are the 5 things from that list that I was APPALLED to see on a list of things the author believes could be done in 60 seconds:

Eat an apple (yeah, maybe if you don't chew)
Call your parents (and be done in 60 seconds? Does this guy know anything about Italians?)
Balance on one foot for 60 seconds (this is lazier writing than what I'm doing right now)
Make a list of your five favorite movies (have you ever witnessed someone take less than 20 minutes to do something like this?)
Wash your hands (3x over the restaurant bathroom recommended time)

Okay, so we are clocking in at exactly 295 words and I'll just apologize and promise to do better in the next one. Head on back to your inbox for something a bit more exciting: surveys and dynamic content blocks.